Feeling Frustrated

I feel really exhausted and frustrated this week because I have to do a lot of works. To tell the truth, I have been very busy through this semester and sometimes I feel like giving up. I have been asking myself why I have to make myself extremely busy. I really want to escape from all those things but I can't.

First of all, the total credits of my course is 25. The reason why I take so much courses is that I still minor in marketing. I have to take another 20 credits of marketing courses before I graduate. And the marketing course are always easily to be arranged at the same time as our department courses. It is hard to choose the courses of marketing department.

Second, I am the leader of my class. There seems to be a lot of works that are considered my duty. I always have to deal with a lot of stuffs for my class. Actually, I was not that busy when I was the leader of my class in the freshman year, but the difficulties and the quantities of the sophomore's couses increase so that being a class leader become more exhausted because I have to spend much time on my studying.

Third, I have to take part-time jobs four days a week because I have to earn my own money for my apartment rent and my daily expense. The economic condition in my family is pretty bad. Because of my father's debt, my mother cannot sent me money every month. She has to work hard in order to earn money for offering my young brother to study and sometimes she has to help my father to pay the debt. She is my beloved mother so I don't want to increase the pressure of my mother. I want to live independently and try my best to earn my own money.

Although I feel unhappy about my tiredness everyday because I sometimes doze off in class, I still try my best to enjoy every happiness in my life. After all, there are more people who live in a much harder life than me. I still think that I am more luckier than many people because I still can go to school and I have money to buy food and I still can live in an apartment. Although I have to earn my own money and I lead a much tiring life than other normal people, I will keep going on and never give up. I want to live happily and I am sure that I can make it. Thanks for this journal because after complaining, I feel much better now, and I regain my confidence and energy.